Season 1, Episode 2 · August 11, 2026 · 44 min
What gaslighting actually sounds like
A phrase-by-phrase walk through the sentences that make you doubt your own memory, and what to write down instead of arguing.
“You don't win the argument about what happened. You keep the record of what happened.”
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Audio for this episode isn’t published yet. The show notes and chapter list below are complete, and the player appears here as soon as the recording goes live.
Chapters
0:00The word is overused — here's the narrow version
5:00Six phrases and what they're doing
18:00Why arguing the facts backfires
28:00Keeping a record without building a case
38:00When it stops being a communication problem
Show notes
What we cover
Gaslighting is not any disagreement about memory. It's a repeated pattern where your account of events is treated as a symptom rather than information. We go through the specific sentences that do that work.
- 'You're too sensitive' as a category error
- 'That never happened' versus 'I remember it differently'
- The two-line note that protects your memory better than a two-hour argument
A note on safety
If naming a pattern out loud escalates things at home, that escalation is itself information. Crisis and regional support contacts are linked below.